So, it’s been a couple of months since I posted anything on the site and the reason for that is because I’ve not had any motivation to go through the motions that come with writing about this club. Two other big reasons are that it’s not been worth it financially to post as much as I was and I’ve been teaching more at a school that I’ve really grown to enjoy working at. So something had to give…
Now, that said, in the free moments I’ve had since the fire in my belly died down I’ve taken to this new ChatGPT fad going around and what I’ve found is something I’d like to share with you.
Basically, I’ve created a prompt on ChatGPT that will rewrite what I want in a specific style or voice that I find extremely hilarious and until I can’t use that profile anymore, I want to use it to spice up some of the blogs and articles that are being posted in the Oilogosphere. I don’t know how often I’m going to get around to it, but if the response is good, I will make the utmost effort to provide you with as much as I can.
Be forewarned though, these posts are not for those who get offended easily, are afraid of profanity, or prefer their articles stats heavy or G-Rated. They will be quite the opposite in fact.
I don’t mean any harm with this new series. So, please, take the following with a grain of salt and be aware of what you’re getting into should you decide to continue scrolling. It’s all parody.
Therefore, with all that out of the way, I present to you Mark Spector’s latest on Sportsnet IN THE STYLE OF… Sarcastic British comedian Ricky Gervais. Enjoy
“The Oilers Need to Get Their Shit Together and Start Playing Some Goddamn Hockey: A Rant”
Holy fucking shit, did you hear about the fucking Edmonton Oilers? They can’t keep the goddamn puck out of their own fucking net! It’s like watching a bunch of clowns on a fucking unicycle at a goddamn circus. They’re too busy playing fucking offense to give a shit about defending.
For two fucking games in a row, they’ve blown a fucking three-goal lead. Last night they fucking lost 6-5 to the fucking Colorado Avalanche in goddamn overtime. The game before that, they fucking blew a 4-1 lead against the fucking New York Rangers. And they fucking keep losing every time the game goes into overtime.
What the fuck is wrong with these guys? They can fucking score enough goals, but they can’t fucking defend for shit. And the worst fucking part is that they know it! They need to fucking shorten their shifts and stay the fuck above their opponents. But for some goddamn reason, they can’t seem to do that.
And fucking Leon Draisaitl, what the fuck is his problem? He scores a fucking goal and then spends the rest of the night trying to pull off fancy fucking passes that only end up on the sticks of the fucking Avalanche. He’s supposed to be helping his team win, but all he’s doing is fucking things up.
Connor McDavid’s no fucking better. He’s supposed to be the best player in the goddamn league, but he can’t even fucking impact the score sheet. And both of these clowns are a fucking minus-1. What the fuck is that shit?
The Oilers are supposed to be a fucking contender, but they can’t fucking defend to save their goddamn lives. They’re fucking surrendering 13 goals in three goddamn games. That’s fucking embarrassing. And if they don’t fucking get their shit together soon, they’re not gonna be winning any fucking cups. They might as well just fucking pack their bags and go the fuck home.
